Second Babies Deserve Showers Too
A baby shower is one of the nicest ways for new parents to acquire the items that they need to have a smooth start to parenthood. It allows family and friends to show the mom-to-be how much love and support she has. In the past, having a second-baby shower has been frowned upon, since the parents are likely to already have the big items like high chairs and changing tables. However, it has become more acceptable to hold showers for a second baby, but with certain modifications.
You could hold a mini-shower where gifts are limited to those basic necessities that are always needed, such as diapers, wet wipes, bottles, burping cloths, undershirts, and bath items. You might ask mom and dad what items they still need and let the guests know. Or, you can hold a shower for mom – instead of baby gifts, bring mom gifts that she will appreciate in the weeks leading up to and after the birth. She’ll appreciate receiving something soothing like aromatherapy candles, or even something for day-to-day use, like a soft robe.
It can also be especially fun to throw a shower that reminds the mom that she won’t be pregnant forever, with gifts like lingerie, chocolate treats, alcoholic beverages, and other items. Mom and dad will definitely want and need some time off, so you might go in together with other guests on a gift certficate for a relaxing spa massage or other special treat. Another option may be to sit down with the guests and the father before the party and make up a calendar (use a dry-erase version) with helping-out offers.
Some tasks that you could arrange for include getting the house organized and laundry done so mom and baby can come home to a clean house, helping transport the older child to his/her activities, or going along to help out on a big grocery or warehouse club run. Mom will be delighted at receiving this calendar full of helpful offers, as well as the names and phone numbers of the helpers (in case of changes). There are situations where neither baby nor mom are in need of any new items. You can also just have a straight-up party, intimate or with many friends and family, to celebrate the upcoming birth.
You may want to ask the guests to bring baby items for donation to a women’s charitable organization. You might also ask everyone to bring small portions of prepared food that can be frozen or stored (this is known as a “freezer party”). Mom will definitely need and appreciate this help as she approaches her due date and also after the birth. It is important to hold this shower quite close to the due date, of course, and to be sure that the mom has enough freezer or storage space to make it work.
Lastly, it is acceptable to hold a full, as-if-it-were-the-first-baby shower in the case of a “caboose” baby – one who, as the name implies, is being born several years after the last child. Many moms and dads in this situation need to start all over again, as the big items might no longer meet safety guidelines – or may have been donated altogether.
No matter what kind of shower it is and what kinds of gifts are given, don’t lose sight of the main reason you are there – to show the mom-to-be your love and let her know that you are there for her and her new baby.
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